So, stop second judging yourself just because you are feeling happy and sad to say goodbye. Ask them to listen to you because you are trying to sort out your feelings. Leaving for a semester abroad, a job, a house, or a relationship can make you too emotional.
Take some time out to reflect on both the good and bad aspects of your experience. Balance it out with fulfilling thoughts too so that leaving becomes doable. Whether the goodbye was brought on by life changes, illness and death, or the end of a relationship, you need to adjust in your new life and for that you need time.
Give yourself that kind of time that it takes for the pain to ease. You turn to your side to reminisce with that person. But then, you realize he or she is not there. In fact, he or she hasn't been there for almost two years.
You can't speak to your former lover. If you are lucky, you'll get minimal updates about his or her life through Facebook and Instagram. You'll see him or her posting pictures with friends you don't know. He or she will seem happy. It's as if he or she is not hurting at all. Your former lover is feeling well enough to go to a club and dance the night away, while you can't even leave your bed. All this will lead you to question whether any of it was real or not. Were you crazy? Did you make it all up in your mind?
Of course you didn't. There had to be some sort of basis for your attachment. Maybe he or she did not feel as strong of a connection as you did. But at some point, somewhere, it had to be real. Even if your former flame was a master manipulator, he or she had to have felt something at some point.
Speaking of those photos with strangers, you'll look closely and realize the person you thought you knew does not really exist anymore. Sure, he or she probably still has the same morals and overall personality traits, but that person's dreams would have changed. Somehow saying that phrase includes the hope and promise that I will indeed see that person again. There is, however, another sort of goodbye that makes my throat hurt for a very different reason. Goodbyes to bad attitudes.
Goodbyes to regrets. Goodbyes to lost opportunities. Goodbyes to unhealthy relationships. And that other people besides myself are being forced to watch play out in my life day after day. That mental picture alone makes my throat hurt because it forces me to face myself and the picture is not a pretty one.
Talk about getting all choked up…how I long to say a forever farewell to those deeply rooted, carefully tended, tentacles of selfishness. But I know better. Saying goodbye comes in many different forms. There are goodbyes that mean goodbye forever. It is never really the same with the everyday goodbye we use. Asks Jemima Audu, an undergraduate of the University of Abuja.
It has happened to me, when he just decided to say goodbye for just no reason and expected me to feel good about the whole thing. It was a terrible situation and will never wish it for anybody not even my enemy, do you know what it means to say goodbye for ever to someone you have shared so many things with?
Saying goodbye is not at all any way easy for the person saying it and the person it is being said to.
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